What Life teaches you no one can teach on this planet.
Life as an ultimate relationship coach by Titus Vargis
Over the course of my relationship I had to learn many things.
As with everything else, in order for a relationship to work better I had to relearn and unlearn many many essential things.
Unfortunately,my relationship breakdown brought me to the walls.
I had to change myself and my way of dealing. Some of the important lessons that I learnt are as follows,
01.No one can fulfill you apart from yourself. Fulfilled life happens when you make efforts on yourself. No one can do it for you.
02.You are responsible for your own wellbeing. Others cannot be responsible for your well-being. They can only support you to some extent.
Relationship by choice by Titus Vargis
03.Your partner can’t be your savior by any chance. It’s suicidal to exalt anyone to meet all your needs. Don’t expect even gods to solve your personal chaos. You must get up and keep yourself straight.
04.Others are not obliged to clean up your mess. You need to act mature and take up the responsibility.
05.It’s not a relationship that brings blessings but your own attitude. Everything depends upon your perspective.
06.What you give will ultimately return to you. This law seems to apply to all things on this planet.
There are no shortcuts by Titus Vargis
07.There is no overnight birth of a beautiful life and relationship. Don’t expect to eat apples overnight when you have not waited for a good amount of time. Nothing happens overnight.
No one talk about this but this is the real culprit behind our Titanic stories.
Right now,I need this in my life and relationship,I know everyone needs this. Would we be caring enough to do this? The task no one can say no to but it depends whether we truly understand it’s importance.
The underlying cause by Titus Vargis.
The sad truth is this: we have social connections,enough money and beautiful people in our lives but this is really missing. Well,in order to live we need three basic necessities: water,food and a home.
But to have an ideal relationship,we need more than these. We are searching for significance. Yes,you heard me right. Deep down of our soul we don’t look for social connections or huge castles but significance.
What’s significance? It’s a value we get as a human being. To not be treated as a zombie. To be getting respect as an individual,as a homosepians. We yearn for meaning in life, not 5 star food or star status on the offering.
We look for importance,sense of worth, acceptance more than physical things. In a relationship,quite often we give everything so easily and we think we have done our best.
Think about this, do you not look for significance? Sense of worth from your relationship? If we are keen to provide this,other things would not create any issue. This is the ‘Thing’ that wrecks you and me and everbody.
There are few real signs to identify the authenticity of love and relationship.
Love is the most misunderstood word on the planet.I think the most most commonly used word in the world would be LOVE. I strongly believe another set of words that are mostly used would be I, We, Us and Me.
What is the conclusion I make from these? Word ‘Love’ is commonly used when we are not literally meaning it.
We use it to mean that we like something, or someone based on our likes and biases.
Not necessarily that others are in our hearts or we are deeply moved by the other.
You see, we are the most selfish generation of the history of mankind. Look at the news or any groups or any so called unselfish people groups who are selflessly doing to mankind much favors.
First of all, why is that these groups or people promote themselves when they are utterly selfless?! It’s a joke!
Who in the world is selfless and selfish at the same time?! It’s absurd!
Well, we live in a time such as this. For us LOVE is equal to SELF. Our motives are clear. We will use any opportunity to gain other’s attention and gains.
We can even use the words such as LOVE or SELFLESS acts of kindness. While the reality is totally different. We fool others and we are deeply perfect in this.
Our schools or colleges teach us and train us to be utterly selfish and put others down at any cost in the name of the so called SUCCESS.
What is the conclusion regarding the love we see around. LOVE of ours is superficial and plastic. It fools others. It is used to gain something.
It is utterly selfish and lacks genuineness. Why is it that we kill each other in the name of religion? Why the educated masses are easily swayed away by fanaticism?!
Why we say we are civilized and at the same time we are totally corrupt and not willing to sacrifice for the sake of others?
Love is kind, selfless, sacrifice, forgiving, bearing one another in weaknesses ,and laying down our own Demonic pride.
Let me share few significant characteristics of such authentic Love and Relationship,
1.True love is coming out of self. It’s all about others and not us.
2.It’s concerned more about not my bread or my money but about other’s hunger and sufferings.
3.It’s about giving,giving and utterly giving.
4.It’s about making a mark in the lives of those who cannot repay us back by any means.
5.It’s about our forgiving when grace is not possible.
6.It’s about showing mercy to the offender the tenth or eleventh time.
7.It’s about not scoring but about getting unnoticed.
8.It’s not about marketing or getting famous but making the lives of the other much more better than before.Its simple and profound.
Hey don’t be giving up when things are going against you.
Here are some wisdom and inspiration for you as you might be facing rough times in your life or relationship.
1. If you accept tough times are part of the seasons of life, it will keep you from sinking into depression.
2. Maintain a healthy perspective. Going through tough times doesn’t mean you are not blessed, you are actually being prepared for something great. Preparation is often not easy but it is the foundation of better things to come.
3. Tough times will reveal to you your true friends and expose the fake ones.
4. Tough times will introduce to you real friends who are attracted to your purpose.
5. The best ideas tend to be conceptualized in tough times.
6. Sometimes God allows you to go through tough times to wake you up and get your attention especially when you have become too familiar with Him.
7. Sometimes you have to reach a dead end where no one but God can help you, so that no one but God can receive the glory.
8. Great people have learnt the art of converting tough times into a path to being a master of something.
9. There are some lessons that tough times will teach you that good times can’t.
10. Tough times will open your eyes to see opportunities and doors that complacent you did not.
11. Some of us lack the courage to move past our current level and lack the initiative to take the next step on our own, tough times will catapult you to the next stage of your life that you are afraid to take.
12. Tough times will make you naked so that you see yourself for who you truly are. Tough times will force you to be real with yourself, what are you really made of? Because when you are going through tough times, there is no one to impress, you have to be you.
13. Most couples enter their best season after they reach rock bottom. That is when their true love is tested and they emerge stronger together.
May you find strength and wisdom to face your rough times,and may you rise up stronger than ever.
There can be no sorry for some issues in any relationship.
5 things I hate in my marriage, and these can happen in any relationship.
Well,they must be avoided at any cost to save your relationship.
01. When I don’t receive back what I give. I always try my best to give love,care, and forgiveness to my partner. Even respect when I feel I have been mistreated.
02. When I don’t feel that my partner keeps the secrets about me. This frustrates me.
03. When I find that in matters of money I cannot ask my partner about my needs.when I get answers like it’s my money,why didn’t you keep your money? This turns me off. I strongly believe that as a partner one should help each other in all ways possible.
04. When I am not consulted regarding some major issues. It can be buying any stuffs or taking a big decision. As a partner one should always first ask one’s partner about their suggestions.
05. When I am ridiculed in front of others and my partner too joins them. This hurts me the most.